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Thursday, December 30, 2010

Year one

Well it officially has been one year since Nicholas got pneumonia. This was the start of our roller coaster of health for our precious boy. I would have never thought that the outcome would have landed us here, a place so deep that at times there is no light at the end of our tunnel. The pain in my heart for my son is a pain that pierces my heart and continues to strike everyday as I read story's or emails from parents who have been on this path longer than us. I recently was told by a parent that no matter how long its been since the day of the diagnosis, the pain is the same for all, and we are all in this together to help one another.

Nicholas is now back on his nebulizer and antibiotics due to a cold that most people just take Robitussin, cough drops and 3 days later they are feeling better. This brings back last year to me as if it were yesterday!  How I hated giving him all those medications, breathing treatments and Shots! He was such a trooper, that now he says "mom is it time for my treatment"? Its very bittersweet to me. I am grateful for all the other moms that i have met along the way, they hold my hand, tell me its ok to cry, tell me to try something different, and don't ever judge the decisions I make for my son's health, but will not hesitate to tell me there is always another way.

I have come to hate the winter and probably will for a long time, one day we will see light and one day he will be 100% healthy.

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